Top Ten Bathroom Scenes

It is that time of year again where most of us are generating our top ten – music, films, books, etc. While all these lists are wonderful in their own respect, I’m taking on a different approach….

Welcome the Top Ten Bathroom Scenes I’ve encountered in my lifetime!

10. Full Metal Jacket – The Last Night on the Island. I believe that this scene sets-up the rest of Full Metal Jacket where it portrays the insanity, irrationality and the unneeded loose of bodies caused by the Vietnam War. It is also where the movie becomes excellent. God, Stanley Kubrick is the man.

9.Dumb and Dumber – Lloyd’s Revenge with Turbo Laxative – This is a great example of gross-out comedy. Where most of us either cringe or cannot help ourselves but laugh while puking.

8. Another Dumb and Dumber scene – The Gas Stop Scene! Not so much of a gross-out but a perfect example of great comical writing. Using occurence of events to generate laughter this scene is gold-in-bathroom scenes.

7. Kingpin – Roy Gives in. This scene, in my experience, is another gross-out scene since to imagine any physical encounter with this lady makes anybody want to hurl.

6.  Messiah of Evil – One of the things that this movie has going for it is the set design. The work that they did with designing the house is beyond words. And the bathroom encapsulates the work done here. If you enjoy extremely bad acting and a make-shift script carry on with watching the movie.

5. Detroit Rock City – Girl Bathroom Scene. A staple of my childhood and where I became exposed to Giuseppe Andrews beautiful face. This is probably my worst nightmare come to life. Also – “Blow-ass” what a great phrase.

4. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia – Mac and Charlie Die. Dee, Dennis and Frank find a Glory Hole in the Bar’s Bathroom. Perhaps not a scene, but a great part of the plot.

3. Royal Tenenbaums – Needle in the Hay. In my humble opinion this is Wes Anderson’s best film. The scene shows Anderson’s talent in melding dramatic notions with comedic devices. I mean, Richie Tenenbaum is committing suicide but the scene is still punctuated with laughter. Just watch:

2. The Rules of Attraction – The Last Letter. Theresa Wayman’s role in this film is not the biggest but it has the most impact. Watch the final letter scene in rules of attraction and become completely hurt by her portrayal of suicide. Seriously, this woman has talent. The youtube video has no audio but I think it amplifies the sadness in the scene.

1. American History X – Hate is baggage. To end off the countdown in a high note. Although the scene itself is gruesome and sad, Edward Furlong’s character Danny Vineyard delivers a great message and gives me at least some optimism for the future.


Cunt Post: Guerilla Girls and L’École Polytechnique Massacre

This past Sunday marked the 20th Anniversary of the l’École Polytechnique Massacre. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the massacre here is a CBC clip:

Basically a madman walked into the engineering school that had not accepted him, went into a classroom of 60, separated the men and the women, blamed the feminists/women for his rejection and proceeded to gun them down. 14 women were killed during this tragedy.

To commemorate the massacre the Guerilla Girls were asked by the University of Quebec to produce a poster. The poster is unlike their usual work which usually uses humor to get a message across; instead the poster takes a look at misogynistic statements throughout the ages. Take a look:


Now for an explanation of each quote/character (loose research, if I have my facts wrong, please do not hesitate in correcting me) –

Hindu Code of Manu: Gathering that it is a set of laws in Hinduism created by Manu a lawgiver. According to a website it is the foundation of Hindu religion and social conduct. Fact or fiction? Regardless it is attached to a religion.

Napoleon: Napoleon Bonaparte, short man who crowned himself Emporer of France and conquered a lot of countries. He basically shaped Europe of the 19th century. He was also a short man.

Confucius: A chinese thinker and social philosopher. His ideas have apparently deeply influenced Chinese, Korean, Japanese and Vietnamese way of life.

Pythagoras: Greek mathematician who founded the religion Pythagoreanism. I learned in my Astronomy class that if anyone went against this religion (that is tried to look at numbers in a way besides the Pythagorean Theorem) was persecuted, poor Galileo’s.

Picasso: Artist, known for Cubism and for being a womanizer. He was also an anarchist.

St. Thomas Aquinas: His work is considered to be the model for priesthood in the Catholic Church. He is often seen as a great lover of Nature. I remember watching a movie of him at my Catholic Boarding School where in a scene he was practically naked “loving” nature. I also just read a quote where he was quoted to have ecstasies when he touches a beautiful rock.

Rush Limbaugh: Douchebag who has a radio show. His radio-show is the highest rated show in the United States. Surprised?

Roch Cote: I think he is a French Historian translator or an Independent Journalist working at the University of Quebec?

Frank Sinatra: Singer, part of the Rat Pack and adored by many, many unfortunate women.

Pat Roberston: An televangelist from the United States, hosts the 700 Club.

Eminem: White Rapper.

One could say that all these man were/are Lunatics. But in their society and ours were/are just seen as extraordinary men. Now, I’m not saying that all men are lunatics and misogynist but that we tend to become blinded when it comes to their misogyny. Men like Frank Sinatra and Eminem are still talked on mainstream media as some sort of icons. Rush Limbaugh is a popular radio host in the United States! And people say that women are seen as equals, pfffffffffffft, is what I say.

According to Health Canada the cost of violence against Women exceeds $1.5 billion a year. The costs are associated to bills attached to minor injuries, dental work, lost of time at work and the use of shelters/crisis/transition homes. In a Statistic’s Canada report made in 1998 (I wonder if our topsy-turvy government has anything to do with this outdated source) shows that women are still outnumbering men as victims of assault in spousal abuse.

Gun Control – On Nov. 4th Bill C-391, a bill that eliminates the required registration of gun ownership, passed in the House of Commons. The argument that caused Bill C-391 to pass was of course that it would save the government billions of dollars. What was of course not considered was the impact that this bill would have on women, men and children. If women are still outnumbering men as victims of assault in spousal abuse, does one not think that the severity and amount will rise as registration for gun ownership is eliminated? Given the example of the L`École Polytechnique Massacre, Columbine shooting and the countless copy cats should we not press for stricter gun laws?

Apathy reigns and it needs to stop…or we will just continue to go backwards.

Feminist over and out.

Cunt Post

Introduction to our Problems:

I know that this may be a bit of a touchy subject but I must, I’m obliged to write about it, this subject being feminism, this feminism still being  stuck on seeing women as more than sexual objects. I know that a lot of my male (and women) counterparts feel that this is a subject that has been well overdone and abused, that our equality has been reached, that now it is all a matter of choice. But to me it is not an overdone, abused subject matter, it is infuriating because of this initial choice.

Yes, I’m stating how uncomfortable I’m about how women are choosing to belong to the patriarchal notion that women are products to be sold. Women are too willing to let themselves become nothing but an image and this to me is frightening. The world has still not escaped the idea that women are glamorized property, a little piece of heaven to be owned. Just turn on American’s Next Top Model and see how every cycle every girl, some with great minds, is ready to just become a signifier of fantasy, the product to be sold to the hungry masses.

So what? Who cares if a young lady decides to become a model? Who cares if a young lady decides to produce pornography? The list could go on and on. Well, the problem lies in the simple fact that just because it was the lady’s choice she is still perpetuating the idea that she was meant to be sold and seen as an object. Even if she has control over her image she is still using the language that is rooted in patriarchal thinking. Her image is still being the one thing that is cherished and valued. Once this image is used it is so easy to dispose of and these ladies are not tissues.

But what of it? Not all of us are giving in to being products of fantasy. And if we are, then are we not contributing to this world’s beauty? Beauty, it is where the complexity of the problem begins. Beauty if handled carefully will not become a negative value, but, unfortunately, it is often mishandled. Mishandled in which it is often categorized as a young woman’s sole virtue.  That it is championed as a virtue, a gift of god and a reflection of someone’s morality. A trait in which gives a woman success and happiness. But beauty in our society is a complete fabrication, of which most women do not belong to, unless they go to extreme measures (hours spent in front of the mirror – making sure you give the illusion of perfection, spending ridiculous amounts of money on the RIGHT clothing, plastic surgery, etc) . This leads to anxiety, frustration, competition and general all round muckiness. And in the end, if you find yourself giving in to the fantasy – a fantasy that has been around for hundreds of years, and it’s getting to old for you, me, us – you are indeed part of the problem.

I’m by no means saying stop making yourself presentable to society, no. I’m just saying stop stressing over whether or not you fit the mold. Cherish that mole above your eyebrow, love your crocked smile, take pride in not being a size zero and having the strength of an ox. But deeper than the superficial: love what is inside of you. Be proud of your mind and find what drives you.  Every time I meet a girl completely obsessed with her looks and not seeing past it, a part of me dies. Or a girl who is convinced she is no good since she doesn’t have that perfect smile. These girls/women are all over the place, just turn over a stone and you’ll find them. Heck, I even fall under this disillusioned thinking. And why are we still falling for the fabrication? Because we are still bombarded with images of the fabrication and it has only gotten worse ever since Tyran Banks decided to continue the fabrication, by implanting the Barbie Doll myth further into the dreams of my generation.

Alls I’m saying is don’t get seduced into being one narrative. You are not just a baby making machine. You are not just a beautiful image. You are not a trophy. For fucking sakes accept yourself already. All women are beautiful, we just have to adjust are thinking: it starts with you. And perhaps if you accept yourself, perhaps we will stop being disullusioned in thinking that the lady that sells her image as a product is empowering; because ultimately the one that holds the cards is the buyer and generally that buyer isn’t really respecting it for what it should be.

This image is not helpful but it exists.
While this image goes too far.

But both images are the two sides of beauty: fantasy and vulgarity.